Adoptee Recommended Best Adoption Books for Children
Start reading to your child as early as they come into your lives. Read to your child every day even if they don’t understand word for word what is happening in the book about their adoption story. The goal is to create a setting where your child will begin to ask questions.
Besides reading being fundamentally great for your child, as an adoptive parent, it allows you to bond with your child and to show your adopted child that you are with them on this journey and they are not alone. They can trust you and believe that you love them and care for every part of their life including where they come from and their biological family.
I understand every family is busy and has so much going on, however, I cannot stress to adoptive parents how important it is that their child knows their truth. Adoption-talk needs to be continuous; not just one time.
I respect the fact that my adoptive mother and I can sit down at any time and talk about my adoption or adoption in general. I love her so much for that. It has shown me the type of love adoption provides because she never made my adoption about her; it was all about me and she was comfortable in her skin as my ‘adoptive’ mom even though to me, she is my mom.
My favorite Best Selling Books on Adoption for Children
Family is about love no matter how different parents and children may be, adopted or not.
Choco wishes he had a mother, but who could she be? He sets off to find her, asking all kinds of animals, but he doesn’t meet anyone who looks just like him. He doesn’t even think of asking Mrs. Bear if she’s his mother-but then she starts to do just the things a mommy might do. And when she brings him home, he meets her other children-a piglet, a hippo, and an alligator-and learns that families can come in all shapes and sizes and still fit together (Amazon).
And Tango Makes Three – Ages 2-5
At the penguin house at the Central Park Zoo, two penguins named Roy and Silo were a little bit different from the others. But their desire for a family was the same. And with the help of a kindly zookeeper, Roy and Silo got the chance to welcome a baby penguin of their very own.
In time for the tenth anniversary of And Tango Makes Three, this Classic Board Book edition is the perfect size for small hands (Amazon).
The Family Book celebrates the love we feel for our families and all the different varieties they come in. Whether you have two moms or two dads, a big family or a small family, a clean family or a messy one, Todd Parr assures readers that no matter what kind of family you have, every family is special in its own unique way.
Parr’s message about the importance of embracing our differences is delivered in a playful way. With his trademark bold, bright colors and silly scenes, this book will encourage children to ask questions about their own families. Perfect for young children just beginning to read, The Family Book is designed to encourage early literacy, enhance emotional development, celebrate multiculturalism, promote character growth, and strengthen family relationships (Amazon)
And That’s Why She’s My Mama Ages 3-7
What is a Mama? A mama is someone who is always there for you. She makes you your favorite food, takes you to the park, and kisses your boo-boos better. Some mamas didn’t hold you in their belly, but they will forever hold you in their hearts. Mamas come in all different shapes, colors, and ages, but they all have one thing in common. They love you! Enjoy the multiple characters in this children’s story which explores the loving tasks of what makes a mama. (Amazon)
Over the Moon: An Adoption Tale – Ages 4-8
An affirming story about international adoption, based on the author’s own experience with her daughter.
A magical, reassuring story of one adoptive family’s beginnings, told in words and pictures that are just right for the youngest child. (Amazon)
I’ve Loved You Since Forever – Ages 4-8
I’ve Loved You Since Forever is a celebratory and poetic testament to the timeless love felt between parent and child. This beautiful picture book is inspired by Today show co-anchor Hoda Kotb’s heartwarming adoption of her baby girl, Haley Joy.
In asking her parents to tell her again about the night of her birth, a young girl shows that it is a cherished tale she knows by heart.Tell Me Again About the Night I Was Born is a unique, exuberant story about adoption and about the importance of a loving family (Amazon).
Imani is adopted, and she’s ready to search for her birth parents. But when she discovers the diary her Jewish great-grandmother wrote chronicling her escape from Holocaust-era Europe, Imani begins to see family in a new way.
Imani knows exactly what she wants as her big bat mitzvah gift: to find her birth parents. She loves her family and her Jewish community in Baltimore, but she has always wondered where she came from, especially since she’s black and almost everyone she knows is white. Then her mom’s grandmother–Imani’s great-grandma Anna–passes away, and Imani discovers an old journal among her books. It’s Anna’s diary from 1941, the year she was twelve and fled Nazi-occupied Luxembourg alone, sent by her parents to seek refuge in Brooklyn, New York. Anna’s diary records her journey to America and her new life with an adoptive family of her own. And as Imani reads the diary, she begins to see her family, and her place in it, in a whole new way. (Amazon)
12 Comments
Amen! It is so bizarre to me that anyone would keep this info in the dark! My parents read about adoption and talked with me about it from such a young age that I have no idea when I "figured out" I was adopted. That's one question I'm frequently asked when I bring up my adoption to someone new: "When did you find out?" I'm proud to say that I never "found out" because it was just always a universal truth to me! The sky is blue, the grass is green, I was adopted as a baby.
I think people are afraid and end up in a situation where they're afraid to tell after making the mistake of not telling immediately. Could that be what's happened in some situations? They don't bring the child up on the idea and then they're afraid to "break" this very life-changing news? Possibly, but all of this could be avoided by upfront honesty!
Hi Emily! I love how you put it, "the sky is blue, the grass is green, I was adopted as a baby". It should always be a part of our lives from the very beginning. It is so damaging to our spirit and our lives when we find out years later or as adults.
There shouldnt be anything to figure out as you said. It should simply be something you have always known. Good for your parents! Send them a huge hug for me for doing it right! LOL. Makes my day when I hear stories like this!
I think it is very possible that adoptive parents fear the backlash from their adopted child after waiting for so long to tell their child. However, I won't call it a mistake. In my eyes it is more their fears or personal desires that keep them from telling their child the truth. My only desire is that adoptive parents simply tell the truth from the start. It would avoid so many problems in the future.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and a part of your journey!
I agree wholeheartedly.
Before we started out adoption journey (we are now waiting), I had a so-called "friend" pretty much demand that I never tell the child we adopt that they are adopted. Even cited an example of a teenager in his family who has no idea, even though the entire rest of the family obviously knows. Went so far as to call me selfish (I think the reasoning was that by telling I would be ruining their life). I ended the friendship right there. I just can't fathom lying or keeping a secret of that magnitude, in some attempt to re-write history. Its the child's life story to know.
This is a part of why we are hoping for an open adoption – no secrets, no fumbling for explanations. The truth from the start.
Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier a very good read re: adoption trauma. If you don't tell a child they are adopted they still feel that something is different, thus wrong and they internalize it.
Thank you so much for listing these books! They look really wonderful. I wished I could have a good way to explain adoption, and I had no idea that such great books like these are already out there.
Hi! I am glad you enjoyed this list. Books are such a great tool! They help to break the ice. Not only that, the illustrations in the book often bring comfort to the child when sharing the story making it not sound too bad as if you were to sit your child down and try to explain it to him that way. Thank you for sharing your comment.
Do you know if there are any books/book makers who can create individualized adoption story books? We have most of the ones you listed, and we read them often. We have two little boys (both adopted), and their stories are so different… none of the books individually apply. I would love to have a fun, illustrated way for them to make sense of it as early as possible. We also have very open adoptions, so they already have relationships with their birth mothers and have special nicknames for them. We want to do everything possible to make them proud of their adoption stories and retain their individuality. I'd love some insight and suggestions!
Hi Lizzy! Thank you for your question. I wanted to begin by saying how awesome it is that you are in an open adoption and all sides are being celebrated. I love stories like this! Thank you for wanting to do all that you can to do adoption the right way and putting your children's needs first. I think creating/designing a book to tell your family's story is a really cool idea! I have two friends I can recommend:
My first friend has a writing company – she is the author of a really good children's book titled, Sloan Saves the Day. She also owns a writing company that helps people tell their stories, copy writing, editing, ghost writing, resumes, anything to do with writing…she is on point and affordable. Her name is Laci Swan, she can be reached at Sharpeditorial (dot) com
My other friend is an illustrator and blog designer. She creates these super cute designs. Her blog/portfolio can be located at maryangela(dot)in I put the "dot" in parenthesis to stop people from spamming in case u were wondering. LOL. Mary is actually doing some work for me now for this blog that I will release shortly.
Please let me know if you have any more questions. Please keep me posted. I have never heard of anyone doing anything like this. It sounds like such an awesome idea. Who knows what make come of it!
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